You’ve got to love the Canadian sense of humour.
West Jet is an Airline with head office situated in Calgary. West Jet airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight “safety lecture” and announcements a bit more entertaining.
Here are several real examples that have been heard or reported by passengers from real flights:
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On West Jet Flight with a very “senior” flight attendant crew, the pilot said, “Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants.”
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On landing, the stewardess said, “Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you’re going to leave anything, please make sure it’s something we’d like to have.”
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“There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane.”
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“As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at the Vancouver airport, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: “Whoa, big fella. WHOA!”
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After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in Ontario, a flight attendant on a West Jet flight announced, “Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted.”
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“In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling, stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite.”
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“As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.”